do not spend some time to analyse the disparate layers of meaning embedded in me. do not take the time to lavish upon the complexity that is me, your shallow emotions conditioned by society. do not pay attention to all the minute details that fill the shell that has become of me. do not touch the tears that are off a different colour, that roll down my colourless cheeks. do not attempt to sew the wounds that have riddled my neck. do not pick me up off of the icy floor that welcomes me.
you. do not.
you sit in the corner and pretend that you are overwhelmed in hurt. you bury your face in your quivering hands and deceive me with your tears after you push me down the steps that lead to the gutter. you sob softly and flinch when you gaze upon the deep gash in my chest and fake that you are to blame. you slump against the wall dazed and weak and convince yourself that this is worse than death, after i am dead.
stop pretending.
i know you have eaten your fill and leave me to the vultures. i know you are relieved because the moment i decided i had enough, i forced submission. i know your elation now that my decision to leave has left you with no choice to make. i know you feel freedom the moment i had turned my back and you impaled me with a sly smile that took form of a shiv that tore through my flesh and left a spine that splintered. i know.
in the perfect world, i would not have known you.
and that would be perfect.
put the gun to my head and squeeze as much as you desire.
i am already numb.
do you see epiphany?
you have cut me down to size.
6 comments:
Rape my mind and teach my body because you are my disease and I can't wait to drop dead.
The stars are getting in and out of automobiles and we keep wondering when we are going to feel something real.
Even if this high is temporary, don't you dare bring me down. Don't exploit my day.
I don't want to be the one to crush the diamond sensations in your eyes, and I don't need a miracle. I just need a friend.
But would I be tempting some form of criticism if I asked you to fall hopelessly in love with me?
Let's go get some soda.
what the.....!!!
if only the words were yours, miinah.
These are some of the most beautiful words I've ever read. Are these truly your words??? I must know...
your words....
precious indeed, the words that can cause such a rift in one's senses...
someone with your talents should be careful what sleeping dragons you whisper them to...it looks like one of them has perhaps already devoured you...
Last week I attempted to take my own life. Obviously, it did not work. Your words ring very true for me.
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